Heather Chapa

i heart chicken


I am a complete disaster.
I have been for years and as of right now it seems as if there is no hope for me.
now I donʼt want to make it seem as if my life is falling apart or anything.
I am a functioning member of society.
just it’s sometimes really hard to be motivated.
hard to get out of bed.
hard to walk outside and face the daylight.

I have a billion grandiose ideas that seem to bombard me all at the same time.
making it hard to think.
making things like the dishes
and sleep
seem second-rate to what must be created
or ideas that must fully be processed.
its hard to concentrate on the real world when one idea finally takes hold
and then begins to snowball out of control.
consuming all of my time.

This is when I wish that I had a maid.
or even better a T.A.R.D.I.S.

I am stuck somewhere in the middle of being a child and being an adult.
Constantly wishing that I could go back to the time when I had more fun
playing with an empty box instead of what was actually inside of it.
A time when my backyard
or a tent made out of blankets and sheets
could be more then what it seemed.
Playing make-believe with my brother and sisters
and not caring about anyone or anything.
Making due with what I had and having the time of my life.

Technically I am an adult
and have to take responsibility for my actions.
I know that I can not literality go back to 1992
back to my childhood
(this is where the T.A.R.D.I.S comes in handy)

Though right now I am not quite there.
I am in-between.

I create works of art with materials that others have discarded.
The most obvious being my hand made paper.
When I am making paper
I get to regress.
I get to play again.
I get to be a child
getting messy
sticking my hands in goo.
Making due with what I have.
Being satisfied with not buying anything.
Physically making something that would have never existed before I came along.
It is not the end product of what I am making that it satisfying.
It is the processes of it in itself.
Though somewhere along the way I do become attached.

i am a 20 something fine artist
living in Milwaukee Wisconsin
i am a daughter
a sister
a friend.